40 days of Reading the Bible by a Clueless, Wandering, Wannabe Christian

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vine grower. He takes away every branch in me that does not bear fruit, and everyone that does he prunes so that it bears more fruit.” John 15:1-2 A timely reminder as I allow life to usurp my peace and joy which I had slowly but surely gained over the past few months, especially as I started to read the Bible over 40 days for lent. It is so easy to slip back into old ways. We’re so fickle like that. For me, it happened because I had family visiting and so all my undivided attention turned to them. I did do my daily Bible readings but its message did not stand out like usual. I did not carry it with me through the day, like I usually aim to do. Shows me how quick to preoccupation my mind and heart is. The above lines have hidden meaning in them. At first, I skim over and yadayadayada goes through my mind… yeah, well of course the father is the vine and I am the branches. That must be the message which I’ve often heard before. And that must b...

19 March, Day 34: Matthew 1:16.18-21.24a I remember my mom telling this story in my childhood.  It was about her father who was posted in Iraq as an accountant during the first World War in the early 1900s. He apparently fell in love with a local girl there, and wanted to marry her. However, he had a dream where St.Joseph appeared to him and told to return home to Kerala, India where there was another, a Catholic girl called Mary (my grandmother :)) who was waiting for him, and she was the one who was meant to be. In an age of nearly extinct letters, postcards, 'message in a bottle's - this story always struck me as quaint and whimsical. Also, it paints a little picture of my grandfather, who I know so little of, as I have never met or seen him. This little story came to mind when I read today's verse which is from Mathew 1:16.18-21.24a : Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the Holy Spirit that this chil...

15 March, Day 30: John 5: 31-47 To be honest, I feel like I have hit a saturation point with my daily reading of the Bible and writing after reflecting on its meaning, because at the bottom line, it is clear that we are all called to be ... well, saints! But, how far removed are most of us from the perfection demanded by the teachings of Jesus :s I am beginning to realise that there is only that much one can achieve by reading and interpreting. It can be hugely mentally satisfying of course. But, it may not be related to faith at all. This can easily turn into just another intellectual exercise, not that there's anything wrong with that. What's the point of reading any book, and especially a "holy" book if you don't allow it to influence your life or cause you to act differently. I suppose that takes real, true faith - a rarity for most? Today's verse is from John 5:31-47 : “The works that the Father gave me to accomplish, these works that I perform...

12 March, Day 27: St. John 4: 43-54 It's very much part of human nature to want to see 'proof' before we believe anything. We tend to want to use fact and reasoning to shape our views of the world, and this is one of the ways we process information. However, there are things beyond human understanding that just cannot be proven - such as miracles, or faith. This is one of the reasons why so many dodgy 'spiritual people' exist and thrive. Because they tap into people's desire for the unknown. And this forces many of us to turn skeptics when it comes to God and spirituality. Today's verse is from John 4:43-54 : “Unless you people see signs and wonders,” Jesus told him, “you will never believe.” Thoughts:  When Jesus travels from Judea to Gaililee, an official of the King come to him and begs him to heal his dying son. Jesus speaks the above words in response but declares to the Official that his son would live. Even before the Official reached hom...

11 March, Day 26: John 3:14-21 I'd often seen John 3:16 mentioned in random places (while watching a sporting event or at the back of a car or spray painted on a wall) without even knowing what it is referring to! It's a very widely known verse, and is said to be a summary of the whole Gospel - imagine that. To read it in full, do look up  John 3: 14-21 For God so loved the world, he gave his only son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but might have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him. Thoughts: Profound words, whose meaning tends to linger for a while. This is the very point of Christianity, it is its essence. Every day until now, I've always tried to find a solid message from the daily Gospel to take away to practically apply in my life. But this verse stands out as it purely rests on faith over complete understanding. So, I try to awaken my faith nd a...

7 March, Day 22: Mathew 5: 17-19  When I get into a philosophical mood, and especially, when I can't make sense of certain happenings and events in life, I always ultimately fall back on "It's meant to be" or "It's not meant to be" as the situation is. That's how I deal with dissapointments and setbacks, coz' we usually ask questions ("Why!!" when we things get rocky, not so much when things are rosy and cosy. Who controls these things? We don't for sure. There are invisible forces at work that conspire to make things happen for us (“ And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it. ”). Today's verse from Mathew 5: 17-19 says, Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill. Thoughts: So Jesus says that he hasn't come to undo all the work that was done before him (i.e the proph...

February 25, Day 12: Mark 9: 2- 10 I realize there is so much I don't know about religion and faith, that I'm living in darkness with regard to most aspects of it. Felt this way after reading today's verse which is about the Transfiguration. A word I have heard being mentioned before, but I'd always skim over it without getting what it really means. I think it's one of those mysteries of Christianity which most people hear about it at 'mind' level but have trouble understanding in their hearts. It took me multiple readings and interpretations. I also heard it read at mass in Church today, and even a couple of days after, I still struggled to put down coherent thoughts. It has a mystical quality to it, and is one of those things in the New Testament, which has not direct takeaway or lesson, the way a parable has, or the way some of the words Jesus says has. I'm in the choir and one of the songs we (appropriately) sang today was called 'Transf...

February 18, Day 5: Mark 1: 12-15 I was reluctant to write today as I just don't want to face the resident feeling of inner yuck-iness. I feel like I've undone whatever good or learning that came from the last 4 days which makes me feel quite useless overall.  In short, the whole weekend was bit of a party as we had friends over. I sealed my fate (dramatic, much?) by staying up with everyone (most of who were pretty drunk) until 4 am. And of course, toddler woke me up just a few hours later (and by now I was really regretting it as I had managed to ignore the inner warning bells! :/) Result: I woke up achy-bodied, sleepless and snappy (coz' of the first two) and this smog of uselessness followed  me around like a raincloud for the rest of the day. Let's move on to the verse of the day from Mark 1:12-15 "The Kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the Gospel." Thoughts: No major analysis required here. It is what is. Speaks directly to my...