40 days of Reading the Bible by a Clueless, Wandering, Wannabe Christian

15 March, Day 30: John 5: 31-47 To be honest, I feel like I have hit a saturation point with my daily reading of the Bible and writing after reflecting on its meaning, because at the bottom line, it is clear that we are all called to be ... well, saints! But, how far removed are most of us from the perfection demanded by the teachings of Jesus :s I am beginning to realise that there is only that much one can achieve by reading and interpreting. It can be hugely mentally satisfying of course. But, it may not be related to faith at all. This can easily turn into just another intellectual exercise, not that there's anything wrong with that. What's the point of reading any book, and especially a "holy" book if you don't allow it to influence your life or cause you to act differently. I suppose that takes real, true faith - a rarity for most? Today's verse is from John 5:31-47 : “The works that the Father gave me to accomplish, these works that I perform...

14 March, Day 29: John 5: 17-30 Never in my wildest dreams, did I ever think I'd maintain a blog this consistently over a short span of time. (There have been countless times that I have wanted to do this as an exercise and even now I've over 10 blogs in various stages of undress somewhere out there in the universe - anything but regular though!) What's even more unbelievable is that I would choose spirtuality/religion as a topic! (I've always had a list of other ideas for blogs - music, poetry, travel, relationships, parenting, life stuff - that I wanted to pursue. ) Over the course of almost a month or so, writing this blog has forced me to face certain uncomfortable truths. There are realisations that I can't turn my back on anymore. There has been the filling of gaps in my understanding. The shedding of light on various things. A boost in my knowledge. And, lots of peace. Plus the satisfaction of putting my thoughts out there to an "invisible" a...

12 March, Day 27: St. John 4: 43-54 It's very much part of human nature to want to see 'proof' before we believe anything. We tend to want to use fact and reasoning to shape our views of the world, and this is one of the ways we process information. However, there are things beyond human understanding that just cannot be proven - such as miracles, or faith. This is one of the reasons why so many dodgy 'spiritual people' exist and thrive. Because they tap into people's desire for the unknown. And this forces many of us to turn skeptics when it comes to God and spirituality. Today's verse is from John 4:43-54 : “Unless you people see signs and wonders,” Jesus told him, “you will never believe.” Thoughts:  When Jesus travels from Judea to Gaililee, an official of the King come to him and begs him to heal his dying son. Jesus speaks the above words in response but declares to the Official that his son would live. Even before the Official reached hom...

11 March, Day 26: John 3:14-21 I'd often seen John 3:16 mentioned in random places (while watching a sporting event or at the back of a car or spray painted on a wall) without even knowing what it is referring to! It's a very widely known verse, and is said to be a summary of the whole Gospel - imagine that. To read it in full, do look up  John 3: 14-21 For God so loved the world, he gave his only son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but might have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him. Thoughts: Profound words, whose meaning tends to linger for a while. This is the very point of Christianity, it is its essence. Every day until now, I've always tried to find a solid message from the daily Gospel to take away to practically apply in my life. But this verse stands out as it purely rests on faith over complete understanding. So, I try to awaken my faith nd a...

8 March, Day 23: Luke 11: 14-23 Do all paths lead to God? Why are people so insistent that their 'path' is the best above others? Does believing in one faith, automatically mean the other religions are null or void? Is there one truth for everybody, or does every person have their own version of the truth. A number of puzzling questions come to the surface at the end of reading today's verse which is from  Luke 11:14-23 "Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters." Thoughts:   In today's verse, Jesus drives out a demon from a mute man who was able to speak as a result. Even though the people watching were impressed, they commented saying that it must be by the power of evil. To which Jesus says, well then that makes no sense as why would the devil want to drive out a devil? ("a kingdom divided, falls") He adds that it is by the power of God that he does it. Demon - could have a metaphorical mean...

 4 March, Day 19: John 2: 13-25 One of the things I hate most about religion, second to fundamentalism, is its commercialization or people making money off God or religion. I've had a personal experience of this at a church in Kerala, India where you could pay a priest to pray for you. People stood in long queues to buy his prayers, right outside the church, within its grounds. There are other examples of world-famous preachers and so-called religious leaders (across religions) who amass a huge following doing the same, pushing "religion" onto a mass of believers, performing miracles and healings and selling a brand name - providing opium to the people. One such religious "leader" in India, now had a multi-million FMCG consumer brand. I've always found this repulsive and disgusting, yet people lap it up - for their good or not- I don't know! On one hand you can argue, if people are taking something good away from it to apply to their lives, than...

27 February, Day 14: Mathew 23: 1-12 A clockwork type monotony has set-in - a comforting sort of consistency. As one day spills into the other, and then merges to become the next one, the morning hour is slow and still, followed by the rest of the day which turns out to be a passing blur. Yet each morning hour feels a little different, as I come to silently grapple with new truths and aspects of Christianity that I hadn't considered or taken seriously or delved into too deeply before. Until now, I've always heard things through one ear, and out it goes through the other. Don't we tend to do the same with well-meaning relatives or friends who come with us with unsolicited 'advice' of any sort? This displays a lack of humility, a stubborn belief that 'I know best'. We are indifferent, we can't be bothered to listen, we briefly 'hear' the words or at the most, we make honest attempts to listen, but still go back to being the same. "I k...

26 February, Day 13: Luke 6: 30-38 Day 13 into this and I am feeling the fatigue of the impact of reading 13 powerful thoughts consecutively. Why fatigue?  Because the effort to be good or trying to be good itself is hard. It requires a lot of little changes, little arguments or fights with your self, little adjustments, little sacrifices, that will make sense I know, for the longer term. By the every day battles can be hard. Not impossible, but just to reiterate... that it takes effort. It's not the easy way that's for sure. But the good news is that, when you are trying to be good and trying to apply 'good words' to your life, everything around you helps you do it. I believe so at least. Here's today verse which is Luke 6:30-38 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.  Stop judging and you will not be judged. Stop condemning and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packe...

February 25, Day 12: Mark 9: 2- 10 I realize there is so much I don't know about religion and faith, that I'm living in darkness with regard to most aspects of it. Felt this way after reading today's verse which is about the Transfiguration. A word I have heard being mentioned before, but I'd always skim over it without getting what it really means. I think it's one of those mysteries of Christianity which most people hear about it at 'mind' level but have trouble understanding in their hearts. It took me multiple readings and interpretations. I also heard it read at mass in Church today, and even a couple of days after, I still struggled to put down coherent thoughts. It has a mystical quality to it, and is one of those things in the New Testament, which has not direct takeaway or lesson, the way a parable has, or the way some of the words Jesus says has. I'm in the choir and one of the songs we (appropriately) sang today was called 'Transf...

24 February, Day 11: Mathew 5: 43-48 Over the past several days, what strikes me when reading the Bible is that how it is in stark contrast with the rules and ways of the world, or what it means to be happy and successful in the world. You'd want to argue, but isn't that the purpose of God? To live a happy and successful life here on earth? Apparently not! We have been created for eternity it seems. Our bodies die but our souls do not. That is a premise whether you believe it or not. There are many people who do just fine in the world, you could say, from the outside. Take social media and how people use it to post highlights fo their lives - personal achievements, pride in their family, their exciting adventures, travel and holidays, achievements at work or play and general stills of ... 'Here's my kickass life, I am totally winning!'.  However, they don't similarly share their messes and daily troubles do they? And we end up percieving their lives to be...

23 February, Day 10 : Mathew 5: 20-26 The morning sessions are going well, despite me waking up at different times in the morning (I blame toddler for some of this).  However, I must start waking at the same time everyday even if a little later than planned. A week into Lent, I decided to give up my much-loved morning cup of coffee. And coffee throughout the day too. I had started to depend on it especially since I started to wake up earlier ("I'll be awake soon, I just need some coffee!").  Now I dream like an addict of the smell of the coffee and that first sip which spreads warmth and awareness through me.  Are you allowed to talk about the said sacrificed thing in such a manner once you've given it up? I've weirdly coming to crave it less, although I think about it every morning! Back to the reading of the day, which is from Mathew 5: 20-26 . Here's the bit that stands out for me: “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there ...

21 February, Day 9 : St. Matthew 16: 13-19 I think this whole exercise was born from a need to live my life differently but not having the tools or direction to really do a thing.  As a CWWC, I've always doubted the need for religion (not God, I believe in God). Religion, I felt made things extremely complicated - too many rules, too many divides, too many orders, too much fighting and misunderstanding. Too many false Gods. I still wish there was only one religion, and that we all belonged to it. One of those things that deeply bother me, but leave me helpless, is the stuff that goes on in the name of religion which has nothing to do with God.  I hate that belonging to different religions also promote a lack of understanding each other. In fact, this almost keeps me from embracing one religion. I don't want to  grow into one of those people who think I or the path I choose is the BEST one for all. I don't want to belong to a religion that teaches this. ...

15 February - Day 2: Luke 9: 22-25 So today, I didn't struggle to wake up or anything, but I did feel quite distracted in the morning and all over the place and numb! I felt like a fraud and forced to be "good" Floated downstairs like a ghost, and then a bit later, I started my session which my my  morning music  (shared by a close friend - Gospel music is not something I usually gravitate towards). As usual, the music helped me gather myself to listen, but I had to struggle to remind myself why I was doing this.  I was groggy, displeased with my weak morning coffee, and was very aware of hunger-induced tummy rumblings. (The last of which, I always give huge importance to!) Feeling  more like a CWWC than ever, I picked up the Bible and forced myself to read the words from Luke 9: 22-2 5, and this line jumped out: "Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me". --------------- Thoughts: Again, I...

First, let me explain what this little project about.  It's pretty basic.  Just me, a CWWC, writing a daily log of observations or reactions or takeaways from the Bible verse of the day.  Over 40 days. Coz' it seems a sweet amount of time. Pretty long and weighty, without being forever. Coz' its Lent. It's time I started to bother about it. #adulting An attempt at purposeful living. Probably way better than spending my time on all fours, trying to sweep up the remains of leftover  crumbly bits from two weeks ago. Or googling Indian recipes for Kale and/or wondering why eating leaves was even introduced as a thing. Or watching some idiot travelling the the world and eating exotic foods and wishing hard that it was me. So here goes. 14 February - Day 1: Mathew 6:1-6, 16-18 I figured the only time I can get the mindspace and uninterrupted time to read the Bible would be first thing in the morning I set the alarm for 5:30 am, hoping that that w...